The Paige Family Saga

A year has come and gone....

2011-02-18T11:09:00.000-06:00

Truly cannot believe my little girl is already a year old!!! Since I have not been keeping up with the blog here are some stats on our TODDLER!!!

She only weights 20 lbs 3 oz and is 29 inches long. A peanut somewhere in the 40-50% range.
That big ol' noggin has her head in the 95th %...nice....
She is all over the place cruising along furniture and crawling and is starting to let go getting stronger and more balanced every day.
A chatter box is an understatement.... says, "mama, ball, dada, baba, caca" (that is what she calls the dogs, started with Rocko, now they are all caca) and a jillion strings of "goo goo ga ga's".
Waves hi & bye bye with both hands..never just one. Claps hands, high fives, does 'so big' and blows kisses.
We have been working on some signs and does them but never at the right times.
LOVES her toys and has a billion of them. Her favorite changes everyday but right now her fav's are a doll, piano, drum, and the little people jeep and person that came in it.
Hasnt eaten baby food in a couple of months because she gets mad when fed, little miss independant HAS to feed herself. She loves vegetables and we have to hide fruit in other things to get her to eat it. She HATED cake at her birthday but loves ice cream. The transition to milk is complete and with her sensative tummy we did it very slow and had no problems. Nice to not have that $22 a week expense! Still have not given her any french fries or fried foods. We figure she'll eat enough crap in her lifetime we can keep it healthy a little longer.
Anytime she hears music she starts bouncing and clapping and waves to almost everyone we pass in the store that makes eye contact with her.

For her birthday we threw a big party and lots of her friends from play group, friends of her parents, Nana from Florida, Aunt Lisa & family all came in for the celebration. She was showered with presents and love had a ball until the melt down while attemping to eat her cake. Good times.

She is the love of our lives and we treasure every milisecond we get to be with her!

Another Milestone...

2010-12-09T21:20:00.002-06:00

Took awhile but nonetheless, here she goes!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbJxvRRKoow

WOW! Thank You Shutterfly!!

2010-11-24T21:44:00.003-06:00

Thank you!!!! Beautiful!! Spent an hour and a half trying to decide which design to use and then which pictures to place. The new faster uploader is great too. Love them!

With Love Chartreuse Christmas 5x7 folded card

Shop Shutterfly for elegant custom Christmas photo cards.

View the entire collection of cards.

Christmas Cards YAY!!

2010-11-24T15:20:00.000-06:00

Those of you who know me know that I am a picture taking maniac and my most favorite thing to do is flaunt the beautiful-ness that is my little family. In years past you have seen pictures of me and the husband, our fuzzy children, a wedding picture and now this year the face of our beautiful daughter will grace the cards.

In doing her birth announcements (not sure if this link will work but here it is http://www.shutterfly.com/ssc/viewPreview.sfly?fid=a17144ef1efb9ca4328a6b68bbcad23c5625c431369d420afd12f45bbad520ea94fc9b6de9c1aa5f186fdf054b74914a)
this was done at Shutterfly.com and man do they make the decision making process a challenge! There were SOOOO many to choose from and came out just beautifully. It is so fast and easy and they ship so fast you will have them asap (which is great for those of us who procrastinate). Now we are trying to choose our Christmas card. EEK!!! I need help, give me some suggestions by clicking these link http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/christmas-photo-cards http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/holiday-cards giving me some ideas because I am STUMPED! Choosing the 3 pictures I want to use was the easy part but picking the card that will feature the face of my angel baby for her FIRST CHRISTMAS has left me blank. Do we do a holiday letter about our big move to Missouri? Do we do the traditional photo card or do we create a folded Christmas card?????????? Help a sister out!!

If you have a blog of your own, they are running a promotion for 50 free holiday cards by blogging about your experiences with them. DO IT and DO IT now! http://bit.ly/sfly2010

Happy thanksgiving!!

5 Months of Joy

2010-07-19T15:06:00.000-05:00

My little munchkin is now 5 months old!!! She is a chatter box, a snuggler (when she is tired otherwise she is way to busy grabbing for stuff), has an infectious laugh and loves to do everything in her power to get her feet in her mouth. She is the love of our lives and I can't remember what life was like before her.

Last week was an eye opening experience for Ellie Belly and me... David was out of town for work from Tuesday until Friday night. Not too hard right? I mean, I can do the whole working single parent thing for the week no problem....wrong answer.

Monday night my throat was sore but I thought nothing of it. Tuesday morning I had an appointment that has been scheduled for quite some time to get not one but 2 crowns done. Ouch. 2.5 hours later I was off to work. Throat still painful every time I swallowed but thought, 2.5 hours of dental work no big deal. Wednesday was painful. Still swollen and still hurt to swallow but went about my day as usual. That night was a different story. Barely slept thanks to the pain and in the morning decided to take Ellie and head to the doc in the box and pray it wasn't something I could pass on to her. Luckily it was not.

Pain meds and antibiotic in hand I dropped Ellie off with Nanny Yo in hopes of getting so rest. No such luck. To make matters worse, the meds they gave me made my stomach so sick that on Friday I was not able to keep lunch down and sure enough was back at home and in bed by 1 p.m. That night David came home. It was the longest week ever without him there and all I can say is THANK GOODNESS he is home!!

We had intended on having dinner with some friends Saturday night and even had a sitter lined up for the night but again....stupid medicine. We watched movies and had a quiet night in. Sunday brought on some anxiety as the reality of our time left in Birmingham set in. In 8 short weeks we are moving 12 hours away to Missouri with David's job. In those 8 weeks time lets hope that we can find tenants for both of our houses otherwise we will not get a mortgage on a new house, I can find a job of some sort, and we can find some reliable child care for Ellie in St. Joe. Wish me luck on packing, organizing and de-pack ratting my husband!!! Cheers!

1 year 3 months later... Babies EVERYWHERE

2010-07-08T15:23:00.013-05:00

Everyone has been on me about updating my blog since my last post. It seems like there has been a baby explosion amongst my friends! 2 of the bridesmaids from the wedding had babies within 2 months of us, one is pregnant now, i have family pregnant, and what seems like my entire circle of friends!

A lot has happened over the course of the last year so I will attempt to catch you up with a few photos....

We got married

Honeymooned in Jamaica

Got pregnant

And became....

Introducing......

Ellie @ 1 day

Ellie @ 1 month

Ellie @ 2 months

Ellie @ 3 months

Ellie @ 4 months

Aside from all of that, I cahnged jobs and returned to my roots of working with the senior population and LOVE my job! I am heartbroken to have to leave....David and I are embarking on yet antoher adventure...we are moving with his job to Saint Joseph, Missouri in a little less than 2 months. Yet another reason for me to start keeping up with the blog again.... I will do my best to keep the postings coming

Cheers from The Paige Family!

T Minus 12 Days and I will be Mrs. Paige....

2009-04-13T10:27:00.002-05:00

Barbara jumped my ass about no new blogs since the beginning of March so here we go... The last month has been shall we say, chaos? Went to Toronto for work and was sick most of the trip. I hung out as long as I could to consume mass quantities of free food and booze with my co-workers but when the sinuses are clogged and a constant dizzy feeling takes over you tend to not wear your party hat. Benedryl was my friend, and the only reason I was able to breathe and sleep through the night!

Upon returning from cold Canada, David had his bachelor party in Kanasas City and flew out 8 hours later. I throughly enjoyed this night on the couch watching chick flicks and cuddling with the dogs still recovering from my trip. David had a blast with all his boys back home. He sounded a little rough on the phone the next morning but that was to be expected! His flight was delayed getting in and we bith CRASHED as soon as he got home that Sunday night and started the weekly grind all over again.

The following weekend we headed down to Florida for our last pre-wedding planning trip. First I had a test run with my hairdresser to make sure we were on the same page for the do for day, next we chose the toasting flutes and got ready for our meeting portion of the day. We went to Angler's Beachside Bar and Grill for lunch where we had the DJ for the reception meet us to go over the expectations and timeline for the AWESOME party we are going to have. Angler's is also the site of our rehearsal dinner so we met with the meeting planner there, gave her our menu and looked at the space since David had never seen it. It overlooks the gulf and we have rented the entire top floor so it will be quite nice!

For the past two weekends we have been busting our asses cleaning, organizing, and getting the house ready for David's family who is using us as a stopping point enroute to Florida. Since most of his family has never been to our house I really wanted to make sure we are putting our best foot forward, not to mention i want his mother to know that I take good care of her youngest baby. We are both sore but the house has been scrubbed from top to bottom, back porch painted, dogs bathed, guest rooms ready and organization almost complete.

In 4 short days I will head down to Florida on my own for my Florida Bachelorette and Bridal shower weekend! My Maid of Honor, Ceremony Reader, 3 Bridesmaids, Mom, cousin and a handful of my long time girlfriends have rented a condo for the weekend where all of the festivites take place. I have my FINAL dress fitting on Saturday morning and I am so excited. I then return to Birmingham on Sunday just in time for David's sister, her husband and their 3 precious kids arrive (inculding our ring bearer!). Then a week from Wednesday we head to Florida for the biggest day of our lives!

In exactly 12 days my single days are going to be over and my life as Mrs. David Paige will begin! I am nervous, excited and still in total disbelief that he actually wants to spend the rest of his life with ME!!!!!!!!!!! And in 14 days, we will embark on our first adventure as husband and wife to JAMAICA. Bring on the pool bar and all inclusive resort because lord knows the stress of it all has set us up for desperate need for a vacation!

If there are no blogs posted for a couple of weeks, Barbara, I know you will understand since you are IN the wedding! Until next time.....CHEERS!

Stop..breathe... Everyone needs a break

2009-03-09T12:10:00.009-05:00

Everyone's life is chaotic right? With me, its non stop. I am an events planner, which translates to evenings, weekends, early mornings....its never consistent. In fact, the only thing that is consistent is the lack there of. Lately, with everything David and I have had going on we often talk more via instant messenger and e-mail then we do in person. Sure we see each other every night after work. We pass each other at the gym as hes arriving and I'm leaving. We have dinner and I am usually passed out by 9:30 p.m. and up at 5 a.m. to start everything over. With the wedding and everything else, my stress level has been at its peak and I have become quite snippy. Of which poor David has felt the brunt of it.

Last week I recieved my bonus from year end 2008. I was praying for enough to cover the cost of the limo and by the grace of god it was enough to cover the limo, the dj and enough to give my amazing (and totally underappreciated by her other managers) administrative assistant a piece of the pie. Anyway, that was somewhat of an answer to our prayers. It lifted a huge weight off of my shoulders. Another "bonus" came about when I was given the option of working a HUGE group that was in house during the day and giving my supervisor the evening supervision. Daivd and I had already planned on going to Nashville on Sunday for the Lawn and Garden show only now we had the option to go up on Saturday night. We drove up after work on Saturday after David ran a 5k and I got off of work and had a room reserved at the Sheraton Nashville Downtown at a rediculously low price (aahh the perks of working for a hotel chain).

On the way up there Daivd drove (as always) and I entertained him..I sang badly, danced like someone mid seizure and we just had a lot of laughs. After checking into the hotel we went to dinner at the Blackstone Brewery. Food was good and so was the beer. Since David is into brewing his own beer i knew this would be a fun place for him....

Then we headed on down to Broadway in Nashville. This is where the famous Ryman Adutiorium, Tootsie's and a slwe of other bars and honkey tonks are.

THe next day we went to the Lawn and Garden show where I ALMOST had David convinced that this would be a great addition to our family....until David thought about it eating the Koi fish out of our pond. Sadly I left my Duckie in Nashville....

After the show we headed on home. My wonderful friend/co-worker Shannon, took care of Macy for us while we were gone. Rocko and Tucker are self sufficent. They will eat when they are hungry so we just fill the food bucket and they are good to go. The cat is somewhat the same way, except he is such a fat ass he probably eats all his food we set out at once and then slips into a food coma the rest of the time we are gone only waking to leave a human sized present in his litter box and cry from the minute we walk in the door until we replenish his bowl. Oh the drama queen.....

And even though he won't admit it... I know he missed her just as much as I did!

While it may have been a short trip and even though David is fighting a cold, I am coming down with one we had a good time. The first road trip not holiday or wedding realted in ages. No real agenda and no interruptions to reconnect after a stretch of chaos and busy schedules. Now it is Monday and the chaos is back to the norm. Work, trip to Toronto next week, David's bachelor party in Kansas City, the last pre-wedding planning trip to Florida and then in 46 days...the wedding!

I am just thankful we were able to stop, take a break, enjoy each other and breathe. Until next time... cheers!

No Bridezilla.....Or at least trying

2009-02-26T13:54:00.002-06:00

There are times I want to laugh, times I want to scream and times I want to cry. Frustrations (on my part) have been running extremely high and I am beyond thankful for my AMAZING bridesmaids who are doing their part to make this day unforgettable. Thankful to Jamie my soloist, Hayley my reader, Willie my preacher, Scheaffer & Stephen my ushers, my family for catering to my crazy ass mood swings and for David to be my calming factor and the de-stressor of my LIFE!

There are a couple of major hurdles I have had to overcome and will continue to have to keep trying to overcome until the wedding day and beyond. One of which is LETTING GO! As a professional events planner, it is my job to pay attention to the details. I spent countless hours tying bows on bubbles, assembling, addressing and tracking invitations/responses, placing the custom labels on candy favors, working on the programs, scouring the Internet for the best deals on my candelabra centerpieces....you get the point.... The letting go portion comes in when the day of the wedding I have been the one directing the ceremony, the one making sure the centerpieces are arranged perfectly, the place cards and seating charts are all set and good to go... as the bride..I can't do that. I am laying my trust in a dear friend Neena (who is graciously missing the ceremony to ready the reception hall) and my cousin Kim who will be my ceremony director. In theory all of this is great! Will I actually be able to not have a melt down? We'll see....

The second hurdle is one of great pain. I am sensitive, anyone who knows me knows that. Our wedding guest list was limited to family and close friends. Emphasis on the word "close". I totally understand if some people cant make it, it is in Florida and given the economic status of the country if you have to pass on the mini vacation to Ft. Walton I totally understand. All of this comes to play with one particular friend that has totally broken my heart. On one hand I want to be so forgiving because she has endured such great pain over the last few months with her family that I know all to well but then on the other I just don't understand what I could have done that invitations go ignored and has not even acknowledged that the most exciting thing that could possibly happen in my life is happening. I want to share it with her, I wanted her to be a part of the day but never had the chance to even ask. The bachelorette invitations, text messages have all gone ignored....as well as the wedding invitation.

It cant be said that I haven't tried to reach out to her. I have tried to check on her never even mentioning my life, trying to remain focused on being a shoulder for her if she needed it. I'll admit that when I started dating David my world became consumed....because I fell totally butt crazy in love with him and as an events planner I work...all the time....and the times I wasn't working I was with him. Should I have devoted more time to my friends? Of course. She was fighting her own battles with family stuff and when things went from bad to worse I tried to keep tabs on her and how she was.....I truly did.

In years past I probably would've licked my wounds and walked away but this is someone with whom I had so much fun with, truly connected with and genuinely cared for and considered her to be one of my best friends. As much as I have tried to "let it go" it hurts. I want so badly to be able to share this huge milestone with her but am being forced to give up. If I did something to wrong her or anger her in any way I wish I knew, instead of just being shut out. Hurdle number two is just a big pain in the ass, trying to not be so sensitive, trying to understand that the biggest thing in my life is really not an impacting factor on anyone elses.

The countdown has begun, the cakes ordered, menus chosen, dress fitted, appointments made. In exactly 57 days I get to marry the greatest man to ever walk the face of the earth and I can't wait!!!!!! SO to those who will be there to celebrate with us and those who celebrate from afar, we thank you for your support. I will do my best to overcome my hurdles with a few less tears over the next 57 days and do all that I can to not become the bridezilla I have sworn to not be!

Cheers!

~The future Mrs. David Paige!!!! :)

Ahhh spring...

2009-02-20T13:12:00.002-06:00

So while I totally love that the spring is coming with beer on the back porch nights ahead I sad to say that I will soon be losing my future hubby to the back yard and his amazing plants. If you were to come into my house today you would think that you were in the jungle with all of David's tropical plants that come inside to live during the winter months but soon, my house will be back to normal and I will lose my dear sweet David to the yard yet again...well, except for the whole wedding and honeymoon thing. (LOL).

I bring this up because it is truly amazing to me what this man can do in the yard. Why is it that no matter how hard I try I can barely keep a Peace Lily alive? Seriously..... I have learned so much from him and have grown to appreciate more of natures beautiful gifts.

Anyway, my amazing future husband has now started a website featuring his plants and what he has to offer to those like me....those with a black thumb! You can check it out here http://shadowscapesnursery.com.

And by the way, the dogs are not for sale :) Cheers!

Happy New Year Bitches!

2009-01-02T07:37:00.002-06:00

Yes, it is New Years Eve and where am I? You guessed it, I am at work. Constantly reminding myself that "I love my job I love my job." It is almost 11 and I am sitting at my desk fighting the remaining ass hole germs that David and I both contracted while in Missouri over Christmas. Totally worth it, always good times in MO.

Any how, it has been quite some time since I last blogged and there is so much to say I just dont even know where to begin. First I should start by following up the last blog about David's big plans to take me to paint in the botanical gardens...where he PROPOSED!!! I still have to pinch myself to believe that it is real. Never in a million years did I think that I would ever find someone as amazing as he is and I never thought that someone as wonderful as him would willingly spend the rest of their lives with me. Every day I fall more in love with him and even though we have only been together a year, I do not remember what my life was like before him and I never want to know what it would be like with out him.

Being the events planner that I am the wedding is pretty much already done. It is going to be wonderful but all of that is really besides the point of the wedding, I get to marry my best friend! At the end of that day, after all the stress and chaos I will be Mrs. David Paige. Talk about a miracle!

I am certain there will be days when I want to strangle him and vice versa but I look forward to ALL of it! The good, the bad, and the ugly. As I was sitting here killing time I was reading some old blogs that seemed to consist of drunken stories that just make my entire body ache trying to understand how just a couple of years ago I did that almost EVERY weekend. My liver can not handle that anymore. I now embrace my fuzzy pants and evenings of home cooked meals with movies and football snuggled up on the couch. I will take that any day over a night of boozing it up for no good reason other than its friday.

In one of the blogs I read, it was at the end of 2006 beginning of 2007 and a lot of it was questioning where I would be in a year and what my life would be like. I sit here and remember exactly how I felt when writing that blog wondering if I would ever find the one and THANK YOU GOD he led me to David. Tested my patience, but has bestowed such an amazing gift upon me. It also talked about how much I had changed over that year or so and going back and reading the blogs from then until now I see how much I have changed yet again. I know that the evolvong and growing process is ever changing but it is kinda cool to see your own words and be able to reflect the changes directly.

Only this time I will say that I do not want to flip to the last page and see how it ends because right now, I am thankful for today, for the now. For the knowing that in 30 minutes I will leave work and be home in time to hopefully kiss my lovah (lol) at midnight and ring in the new year properly. This year I know I will change, I know my life will change only now I am not scared, I am beyond excited.

So happy new years to my tens of readers. All the best to you and yours! I will do my best to keep the updates coming over the next year as the future in store is so exciting!!!!
Cheers!

Fat

2008-11-20T07:55:00.002-06:00

Ok, so I have been doing weight watchers for a couple of months and have proudly lost 15.2 lbs. That is more than 10% of my entire body from when I started. I am super proud but soooooo want a f'n quarter pounder! Here is my question though.... Is there weight watchers for cats because good god my cat is a FAT ASS! Granted, he is a Main Coon cat so he is naturally a big cat but holy fat rolls bat man....... Here is my Casper....

Love....

2008-11-13T14:12:00.003-06:00

Seriously, I never in a billion years thought I would be this lucky..... Prepare yourselves because I am sure you will throw up in your mouths a little as I say that I fall more in love with him every day and thank god a billion times a day for bringing us together.

Those are the faces of one ridiculously happy couple!

Go vomit. :)

WE'RE ENGAGED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-10-29T07:46:00.003-05:00

What a whirlwind the last 5 days have been!! AS you saw in my previous post, David had planned a very sweet day in the Birmingham Botanical Gardens since I was off on a Saturday for which I was so excited but had no idea what was in store for me.

That morning, we got up and got ready and bought some canvases and headed down to the gardens. We set up in the Japanese Gardens because it is my favorite section of the Gardens. We painted for a while and enjoyed the cool fall weather. I finished my mess of a painting first and began walking around a bit and peeking at David's painting. He asked me to go stand on the bridge and he would paint me into the picture. I took this as "stop hovering you are getting on my nerves". So I grabbed some animal crackers and went to the bridge to feed the Koi.

A few minutes later he waves me back over to him and as I approach, the picture is facing him with the back towards me. He asks "What do you think?" and takes a step back. I turn and look at the picture and across the top he has painted "will you marry me?". I turn to look at him and he is down on one knee with the ring in his hand. All I heard was "Christine, you know I love you.." and then I just started screaming. The tears flowed and I just couldn't believe that this amazing man wants to spend the rest of his life with me! About 5 minutes into the ordeal I finally said yes and put the ring on my hand. The most amazing 1 carat, round cut, solitaire in white gold I have ever seen.

Being the respectful gentleman that he is, he called my older brother last week and asked his permission. My father passed away 3 years ago and Patrick is now the head of the family. I called my mother and should've asked what she was doing before I told her as she was driving and had to pull over!

The rest of the day was spent calling everyone we know and letting them know the amazing news. Our wedding (how crazy is it to be able to say THAT!) is going to be in 6 months in Ft. Walton Beach, Florida. 4/25/09. The details are still working but already so much has been done.

I just can't believe that I finally have found the man of my dreams....who knew that I would turn out to be the woman of his......

Such a keeper!

2008-10-23T07:56:00.002-05:00

For those of you who know me you are well aware of all the disastrous relationships I have been in. You have all witnessed the meltdowns, the heart breaks and the pain. I have dated some real jerks.... the man that I am with is so amazing that I feel as though I need to pinch myself to make sure it is real. Don't get me wrong, he is by no means perfect but what fun would that be? I posted a blog about when i was sick and he baked cupcakes and brought me mums to make me feel better. The week before last he did much of the same, after the worlds worst day at work, and I mean WORST as in coming home in tears.... I walk in the front door to dinner cooking, Michael Buble on the Ipod home in the kitchen, a bottle of wine chilled and a beautiful vase of flowers, all in my favorite color....pink. Pink Gebera daisies, pink roses and accented by eucalyptus...my favorite aroma. That floored me, brightened my entire world and with one of his big hugs and a kiss he wiped away all of the bad and replaced it with good. Yet again I wondered, how did I get so lucky?

Last night I get home from an 11 hour day tired and cranky (and irritated at the fact that I now have to wear glasses...at least i will in 2 weeks when they are delivered). One hug from him and the world is good again. So I am in the kitchen doing something...I don't remember what, and David says "hey you don't have to work this weekend do you?" I told him I did not and he said "You know what we should do on Saturday? We should get your paint stuff and go to Botanical Gardens and paint." To which I almost came out of my skin. I would LOVE that!!! I LOVE to paint and sadly my brushes have not touched a canvas in months! So with the nice cool fall weather David and I are going to spend a relaxing Saturday in the gardens for which I can't wait!

How does he do it? How does he know just how to turn everything around and make my entire world light up? No matter what we are going through at work, lack of fun money, and all the other stresses in life..it all seems so much easier to deal with when I have him by my side to make me whole....He truly is my better half and I thank god (and my Dad) for leading us to each other as I really believe that we were made for each other.

My friends are funny...

2008-10-01T10:51:00.003-05:00

Me: "Do you like Mac and cheese?"
David: "No, I mean really what do you eat that with?"
Me: "Um, like everything! How can you not like mac and cheese? That's almost un-American! I LOVE it!!"
David: "Of course you do, you have a vagina"

Me: "Oh my god Katy, look at that lady's purse, its like magazine cut outs of Keith Urban paper mached into a purse."
Katy: "Oh my God"
me: "Bless her heart, she probably made that just to carry to the concert"
Katy: "That is totally from a pine cone swap"
me: "a what?"
Katy: "you know, one of those awful old lady church functions where they just trade homemade crap for each others homemade crap...hey, i like your macaroni necklace. i'll trade you for this playdough ash tray"

Me: "I swear, some men just lack that sensitivity filter and say things that floor me."
Dommer: "Every guy needs a voice of reason to smack them on the back of the head and say 'No. bad. apologize. no' and then smack them again just because it's fun"

Ashley: "why do people call pancakes "flap jacks" I don't really get that....pancakes I get cause they are cakes you can make in a pan....but flap jacks???? if it was flip jack I might understand a little more cause some people "flip" their pancakes while cooking them.......but who the hell is jack and what does he have to do with breakfast food?!?!!? "

Me:I have a funny ha ha for you...... So this is what my latest fortune cookie told me... "you are the crispy noodle in the vegetarian salad of life" I was like WTF??? Exactly what does that mean???
Ashley: If you were a cow...what would your resume say??????? I mean besides the obvious...."mmmmmoooooooooo"
Me: Just call me crispy from now on, crispy noodle. DUDE?!? Sometimes i wish i could enter the mind of my funny friends like yourself just to be like a fly on the wall and see exactly what runs through there... like if i was a cow what would my resume say.... Here are a few words of advice for ya... put the pipe down and walk away. Crack kills!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA just kiddin' but seriously... i need a cheese burger.

Ashley: Well, one thing the cow wouldn't say is..."i need a cheeseburger" come on Chrissy! Think, Think....that would be like you putting on your resume..."I eat people" uuuummmmm, try again!!!!!!!!!! Is the phrase "your cute as a button" suppose to be a compliment?????? Since when are buttons cute anyway?

Seriously?

2008-10-01T08:56:00.003-05:00

So lately I have been mentally compiling a list of things that irritate me and I realize that I have way too much time on my hands and that I am kind of a bitch, entertaining....but bitchy. Nonetheless, here ya go...the latest inner workings of my mind....

1. To the dudes in the pimped out caddys, mini vans and vehicles where your stereo is worth more than your car... let me say this. I fully appreciate the amazing fall weather that we are experiencing right now (and I too would like to "roll" with my windows down). However, this does not mean that the entire city is anxiously awaiting the booming sounds coming from your car. Recently while on my way home from work, with a headache I might add, I was stopped at a stop light with a caddy on one side of me being driven by a gentleman with pantyhose on his head and to my right a portly young lady with 3 inch long nails talking on her cell phone. Both of these cars were BLASTING their stereos to the point that my windows were rattling. In between the booms all I could hear was "shit", "fuck", "nigga", and "bitch". This is with my windows up and radio on. Really people, do you want to be able to hear your grand children when they speak to you because you will surely be deaf by the time they come around. To the Caddy guy... does the pantyhose on your head restrict your hearing? IS that why you need it to be so loud? To fingernail lady, How do you even hear who you are calling with the radio up like that? If either of you were my neighbors the police and I would be on a first name basis. Not everyone enjoys your music like you do and no one really wants to hear it. So roll up your damn windows, turn down the bass and put the volume to a normal level before I begin to retaliate by blasting Michael Buble or some awesome New Kids on the Block or something right outside your windows!

2. To the storm trooper I saw walking trough my building the other day.... I get that everyone is an individual and has the right to make their own fashion statements and to go through the midlife crisis in their own special way but dude, you look like an ass and I wanted to slap the stupid right off of you when I saw you. Explanation: I work for a hotel. Connected to the hotel I work for is a convention center complex and a building (where my office is) that houses numerous other offices and even a radio station. Given the number of people that filter through these halls on a daily basis (being transient or not) you can only imagine the oddities I spy. On this particular day, or as I like to refer to it, "male menopausal Monday", I was cut off by a geezer in a corvette on the freeway, almost rear ended by an old fart in a mustang and then encountered this dude.... Exiting my office building I am headed toward the parking deck via sky walk and this guy is walking in front of me wearing head to toe motorcycle gear. This looks like a cross between a Halloween costume with muscles built in or the white storm trooper guys in starwars. Bonus! He is talking on his tricked out Bluetooth! not to mention he around 70 years old! we reach the parking deck where i see numerous harley's and other "age appropriate" motorcycles and which one does he get on? The vespa? Of course not... the sport bike! I mean, the full on Ninja! Kids...if you see grandpa on one of these just tell him "NO!". If he insists on riding a motorcycle, at least fit him with an outfit that is a tad less retarded and a helmet that doesn't make him look like a giant tampon. Thank you.

3. To those with whom I must converse even though I'd rather stab tooth picks in my eyes, I beg of you. Learn how to speak! ENUNCIATE! Maybe it is the southern accent but when you do not say the entire word and it just fades off into god knows what you sound like an idiot! I can't understand you! Don't say things like "fixin"- there is a g on the end of it for a reason, "on tomorrow"- WTF does that mean anyway? "A'int" Seriously? I have never been anywhere like the south where you can have a group of educated people who sound like idiots! Do you not realize that people conceive the south the way they do because you sound like a toothless wonder on the local news talking about the "nader" that just ripped through your trailer park? ENUNCIATE ENUNCIATE ENUNCIATE!

...and what did we learn today? No one wants to hear your music, let alone with profanities. If you must purchase an extension of your penis at your mid-life turning point please do so with out the asshole stormtrooper outfit...i am embarrassed for you. And last but not least, for the love of God, SOUND OUT YOUR WORDS! Jeez people!

Thank you for letting me rant. Cheers!

The fuzzy children

2008-09-18T07:49:00.003-05:00

So I am sure that most of those who read this have their own "fuzzy" kids and can relate.. Since I moved in with David and we merged our animals, as a whole he and I have 3 dogs, a cat, and a crap load of fish in David's amazing pond/waterfall thing he built and each of them have their own personalities and some of my favorite moments of the day are with each of them....

The Fish: There are probably 30 gold fish in the pond. I can't tell them apart (except for the babies) so I don't pay too much attention to them. There are 3 Koi in the pond. The first is Bubba, David had him when we met and the thing just keeps growing. Probably because his fat ass goes bat shit crazy anytime you toss the food into the pond and tackles all the goldfish to eat it all. Next are the 2 that David and I picked out together. Their names are Booger and Pickle. Why are they named that? Because I have always wanted to name a pet Mr. Pickle and David figured this way I could get it out of my system. They are growing like weeds and well...they are fish... no real personalities there....

The Cat: Casper, a 6 year old Main Coon Cat who is declawed and neutered and weighs like 15 pounds. He is a BIG cat and has BIG poop. David and I adopted him a few months ago. Not having ever had a cat I did not know what to expect. At first the cat HATED me because I wanted to hold him and snuggle with him. Apparently cats do not like this. He loves men and is forever seated next to David on the couch. Over time is growing to love me. He wakes me up in the morning by kneading on me and when i do not pet him he will "nibble" on me. I have also woken up numerous times to him chewing on my hair which is just odd. He tries to climb in the shower with you, begs at the dinner table by crying and putting his paws on the table, lives to torment the dogs, sleeps on his back with one arm behind his ear (like he is holding a phone), has the tip of his tongue sticking out most of the time and likes to lay on plastic bags..... But he greets you when you get home and follows me around in the morning and I just love him! The mornings are my favorite time with him as he is so snugly and lovable..except for the whole chewing on my hair thing...If you ever stay at my house, do not leave anything laying on the bed you intend to wear, esp. if it is black, because he will lay on it and he sheds.... a lot!

The dogs: Oh the dogs.... I have my favorite times with each of them and their personalities are all so different! First we have Tucker, the beast. This is David's child...a beautiful, abnormally large yellow lab who is strong as an ox and sweet as can be but NEVER stops moving! He always wants to play, is obsessed with a ball and would give all the milkbones in the world just to stare at the cat for hours (Casper is not a huge fan of Tuckers and growls at him for all the hours Tucker stares at him.) Normally Tucker is so hyper I cant really hug on him or love on him with out being knocked over or bruised. He has no idea just how strong he is and just wants to play. My favorite time of the day with him is first thing in the morning. I get up first, let Macy out and get Rocko out of his crate. This is the time of day when Tucker stretches and still in his sleepy mode just wants hugs and kisses. Every morning I go out on the porch and steal a few minutes of sweet kisses and fuzzy affection from Tucker. There is no jumping, no playing, just snuggle time and tail wagging. For those brief moments in the morning, Tucker and I bond.

Next there is Rocko, a 1 year old mutt that David got from a walmart parking lot out of the back of a truck. He is our little Mexican and we swear is a little "slow" but is a total Momma's Boy who keeps us laughing non stop. He is shy around people he doesn't know so don't expect him to greet you. You can pretty much count on him hiding behind me or David. He uses his arms as though he were a person, LOVES affection, and likes to sit on your feet and look up you and lean back....for which he almost always falls over backwards. Since I am the first to get home from work for the day, I let the boys out of their gated kennel area and Tucker generally will go tearing off into running laps around the back yard and Rocko will wrap his front paws around your waist and give you a hug. He would do this all day long if you let him. This is the reason why I do so much laundry.... i forever have paw prints on my clothes and don't care! He loves to chase the laser pointer, take whatever toy Tucker or Macy has, LOVES to wrestle with his siblings and looks at you with an expression of "duuhhhh". God I love that dog!

Finally there is Macy, my sweet golden retriever whom I have had for almost 6 years. The first love of my life. She is just a lover and wants to be scratched all the time and will nudge you with her cold little nose for you to just lay your hand on her head. When I get home from work, she is barricaded in the kitchen with a baby gate and is usually doing her clydes dale dance of excitement crying the entire time and smiling....yes, she smiles. She grabs her toy to let you know she is happy to see you and gets so excited her eyes close with her huge smile and lays on the floor for a belly rub. Once we have a little talk about how her day was we head outside to get the boys....for which she can't wait. As soon as I open that back door she barrels towards them to say hello and anxiously awaits my arrival to let them out and goes off running with Tucker around the yard. She loves her stuffed animals, wrestling with the boys, and doesn't know a stranger. She thinks everyone is a friend and can melt your heart with those ears perked up and look on intrigue on her face. The best part, she ADORES David. While she will always be my child, she sleeps with David when I am not there and generally just worships him....much like her momma!

Those are my favorite moments of the day with my kids. I love them all for the little individuals that they are and for how much the enhance our lives. If it was up to me, we would have more animals but sadly, David has put his foot down.... and that is OK. Welcome to the snap shot of my daily life.

Cheers

He amazes me.....

2008-09-09T07:17:00.000-05:00

Every now and again David does something that just blows me away. He is not an overly romantic man, but the little things he does makes me wonder sometimes.... How did I get so damn lucky?

Last night I was sick (and still am). To the point of being so miserable every time I stand up I want to hurl. Tomorrow night I am hostessing a bridal shower for a girl at work and had to bake all the cupcakes so that tonight my friend and co-worker Susan could come over and decorate the cupcakes with me. How I was going to accomplish this task when I could barely stand up was unknown.

David comes home from work with a box of tissues and happy flowers (yellow daisy like mums) for me and immediately jumps right into making dinner....which I almost always do. While he was cooking he came in and asked where my hand mixer was. Confused, I got up and went into the kitchen to find him ready to bake the cupcakes. I got out the hand mixer and immediately had to go and lay back down.

A little while later I went in to the kitchen to unload the dishwasher and clean up after dinner to at least try to help with the daily chores. He shooed me away and took care of everything.
So last night he cooked me dinner, brought me flowers and tissues for my sick little nose, cleaned the kitchen and baked 4 dozen cupcakes!! Never in my wildest dreams did I think that I would get so lucky to have a man who could be so caring and sweet! I am one lucky girl!!!

To all you men out there, it is the little things in life that make the difference. Not the grand gestures but the little things that let us know you care. I love that man with every ounce of my heart and soul and while he may not shower me with presents or write me love songs, he lets me know he loves me with little things like that..... and those are the ones that mean the most! He never ceases to amaze me!

Happiness is....

2008-08-27T07:45:00.003-05:00

Well, it has been awhile. My bad. Work and everything else in life has just been CRAZY to say the least and much has changed in the last...2 days.

For starters, David and I hit a bump in the road a little while ago and we talked everything out and realized our issue, worked on it, tackled it and grew even stronger because of it. The latest is so exciting (and scary) and I can not wait! David has asked me to move in with him. After only 7 months together we are taking the next step. We are both fully aware that it will be an adjustment but we are both so happy about this decision. I can not wait to fall asleep with his arms around me every night and wake up to his grumpiness in the morning. I can barely sleep on the nights he is not with me and my comfort level is at an all time high anytime he is by my side.

After my father died I was reeling and lost. I didn't know where I wanted to go in life and then i was offered a job working to raise funds for the Muscular Dystrophy Association, the disease that inevitably took my fathers life. I felt as though it was my father who led me here. For the first time in my life I truly felt like it was divine intervention.

I hated that job and was miserable there even though I felt so strongly about what I was doing. I changed jobs, dated a guy which led no where and was yet again burned out with work and life. I questioned my reasons for being in Birmingham and wondered why my father and God sent me here. And then I met David, he is this amazing combination of everything I ever wanted in a man and a billion things I never thought to look for. Never in my life have I met a person who can make me laugh like he does, see right into my heart and soul and let me know that I am loved just by looking at me or holding me in his arms. There are no words to describe the love I feel with that man in my life. He is not only my better half, he is my best friend, my strength when I fall apart, my voice of reason and the one who calms my soul when anxiety about inane things takes hold. We play together, pray together and are looking forward to what lies ahead.

Since he came into my life much has changed, I have changed and I am a better person for it. I thank God and my Dad everyday for leading us to each other.

To me, this is what happiness is......

Ahhh the silver lining....

2008-07-31T09:46:00.003-05:00

So after the 2 weeks of travel I came down with a cold/flu/sinus infection that knocked me on my ass. How do you get the flu int he middle of the summer? Your guess is as good as mine, but I pulled it off.

Recoup, work all week + some of the weekend, try to mend the strain within my love life and attempt to relax on a Sunday...did that happen? OF COURSE NOT! Macy, my 7 year old fuzzy child got sick.

Long story short..emergency vet, regular vet the following day, $600, many tears later she will be fine. We are now on doggie meds for the rest of her life (for which I praying is a long long time). And back to the daily grind.

As crappy as the last couple of weeks have been, the silver lining is peeking its head out from behind the clouds... Last night David and I had a quiet night with just the two of us and spent most of the evening being silly and laughing. I am finally beginning to feel like we have gotten past our first rough patch since this relationship began 6.5 months ago. And what a rough couple of weeks it has been......

Every now and then life seems to take a big fat dump on your head but luckily, if you are as fortunate as I am, you have some great people in your life to help you get through it. Things are looking up!

Out of touch with the world

2008-07-17T11:27:00.002-05:00

So for the last 2 weeks my life has been sheer chaos. I am exhausted, fighting a losing battle with a cold and completely broke. On top of that I have PMS so steer clear!

For the 4th of July weekend I made the 4 hour drive home to Ft. Walton beach, Florida for 3 days in the sun. Spent the 4th drinking beer on Crab Island and hanging out with old friends. It was wonderful. Headed back to the ham on Sunday of that weekend where i proceded to pack for the trip to MO. I worked 1 day and then Tuesday boarded a plane to meet David's friends and family.

The trip was a blurr of small towns, bars and cows and oh so much fun. We spent the last couple of days at Lake of the Ozarks with his family and were having a great time until Saturday night when they recieved word that David's Grandmother had passed. Sunday we drove back to the ham, worked one day and that night hit the road to head back to MO only to turn around and come home on Wednesday after the services.

In total I have spent the last 4 days in a car. I am tired, I am cranky and all i want to do is cuddle up with David and go back to sleep. Only that is not an option. I have to work all weekend. I am offically going through withdrawals with out David by my side and could honestly cry I am so miserable.

That is all for now. Nothing funny, nothing witty, just whining. I am going to go put on my big girl pants and deal with it. Cheers.

Edrama?

2008-06-30T19:11:00.002-05:00

Everyday I feel like a robot. My alarm goes off at 5 a.m. then again at 5:30 a.m. At which point I grumble my way out of bed leaving my fuzzy baby still sawing logs in my comfy bed. I take a shower (how do i not butcher my legs every morning when shaving half asleep?), get ready and head to work to be in the office by 7 a.m. I log into the computer system, open up my e-mail and while the billion items pile up on my to do list I settle in with my starbucks and banana and go online. First I check my personal e-mail which generally consists of spam, check myspace which has become painfully boring, same with facebook, and then the high light of my day... my sister-in-law's blog. This blog is forever packed with cute pictures of my beautiful nieces and post upon post of funny banter. Do I care where she gets the ideas? No. She is funny.

Today there was a blog on there to which the roots of which I am uncertain but it was all about edrama and her being accused of copying someone else's ideas. There are billions of blogs in this world and someone accused her of stealing ideas. Ridiculous. Is there really an entire realm of people who have nothing better to do with their time than to float other peoples blogs and be ugly? To this I must say, as a society as a whole, we have become a plethora of chicken shit who hide behind our computers. Instead of calling someone or god forbid stepping it up to someones face to have a civil disagreement, we hide behind the safety of of a screen thus creating e-drama. I am not saying that I am not guilty of doing the same in regards to confrontation as it is always the easy way out for an argument but seriously people.....edrama?

After reading her blog i was thinking about one particular situation where someone who used to be a best friend to me all though out college had some nasty things to say. Instead of her calling me she said the most awful, hurtful things to me over instant messenger. Things that you wouldn't expect your worst enemy to say. Granted, she was in a BAD place in her life and was seriously messed up there was still no excuse. To this day, I do not know if it was the cocaine talking or really her true feelings. The point is she chose the world wide web as her outlet to be NASTY. This was a few years ago and she has since tried to rekindle the flame of friendship but and while we are civil she never apologized and we will never be able to mend that rift. She is clean now, I think, but still.....it was all about the e-drama. Had we been face to face she never would've said those things. Never. She hid behind the safety of her computer screen and said words that cut so deep into my heart and soul they have yet to even begin to heal.

Here is what I am pledging, to do my best to do my confronting any difficult situation in person, or over the phone at the least. I promise to not hide behind my e-mail, text messaging, or instant messenger. So get ready world, if you piss me off expect to hear it from me directly not via advanced technology. I will be one less enabler of the edrama of the world and if you too choose to be back in the full on human race and do your confrontations face to face be proud of it! So here is to you Angie giving the finger (not a thumbs down) to the sad, sad little people who feel that the best way to live their lives is with the safety net of a computer and no balls to back up their smack talk. I think you rock and I LOVE your blog!

Cheers sister!

Proof that I am a Whack-a-doo

2008-06-25T16:07:00.002-05:00

So this morning on my way to work after my Starbucks run I was just toodling on my way to work when this incident popped into my mind.... it happened just a few short months after I moved to Birmingham and I laughed my ass off thinking about it. During rush hour nonetheless. Once I regained my composure and glanced around at the cars around me I realized that everyone was staring at me like a total nut job. All I could think was..... yeah, from the outside looking in I do look a little left of center. Do I care? Um no.

Later on today I was working (pretending to look busy) when i found the actual blog on myspace where I wrote about that particular incident. Enjoy....

Thursday, August 03, 2006
A quickie....
You are going to love this one.. So I went to the tanning bed at lunch today to relax and get some sun on my pasty ass, So anywhooooo I was there and had to wait for the ten minute bed because its too hot to go in the 20 minute ones. Well, while I was waiting the guy who works behind the counter (whom I have questioned his sexuality for some time now) was talking to me about his show (Days of our lives) and that its just so late he falls asleep watching it because he is so tired after his dance classes that he teaches. I opened a can of worms by telling him I used to coach cheerleaders and did all of the squads choreography. I almost peed in my pants as he comes flying around the counter saying ooh ooh watch this and tell me what you think so he starts sashaying and spinning and kicking and arms fluttering around the lobby of I-tan. All it was missing was jazz hands and a big I'm GAY. So paint a mental picture, an orange, leg shaving tanning bed employee is dancing around the room as I stand there completely dumbfounded in my fab ann taylor pants, cute v neck ann taylor shirt, black strappy ann klien heels, big fat black Ralph Lauren sunglasses on my head and my red leather purse with a look of complete awe. I felt like I was having an out of body experience like I was watching an episode of will and grace and jack was parading across the screen only no, it was real life in my face. When he finished his routine (which he narrated the entire thing like and pause for the music 2, 3, 4, and balance relax, sway!) He looked at me and said well, what do you think of that? I was like yeah, thats really nice. So then I asked if he ever told anyone that they needed a break from the tanning bed because they are now orange (like himself) and he said oh girl, you have to see this. Pulls up his myspace page (damn I should looked at his screen name) where he showed me a picture of his dance team with him after the pool, they were all in bathing suits and all had towels on their heads (yes even him) and he was like, look how dark I am compared to them?!?! When in reality he looked like an umpah-loom-pah compared to the pasty little girls. I almost wet myself. Then the entertainment ended because my bed was ready. God I love that guy!!!!

Such a follower..... sort of

2008-06-24T12:45:00.000-05:00

Ok so I am joining the flock...sort of. See, I started blogging on myspace a couple of years ago which a select few of my friends really seemed to enjoy reading my thoughtless, sometimes humerous, occassionally serious blogs. That has slacked off in recent days....err...months. Then my sister-in-law started her blog (which is as addictive as crack or dairy queen...whichever you choose. I opt for the peanut buster parfait thanks to the dommer which has inevitably led to the enlargement of MY ASS), my brother has his and now the dommer even has her own blog. So yup, you gussed it, I too have jumped on the blogging band wagon.

I signed up for my new blogger account this morning, set up my profile and have yet to think of anything witty or remotley entertaining to share with public. So I decided list a few things that I have come to realize in the last month.....the LAST year of my 20's. The last year of it being socially acceptable to act like an ididot (which I almost NEVER do...ha!) and start acting like a grown up. The last year I before i reach that pivotal point in life where I am more than offically labeled as an adult. Here are a few of the gems of life i have realized.....

Skip a couple of weeks at the gym and your ass grows.....like weeds... and so do your thighs and hips and tummy..... ok so i relly need to put down the peanut buster parfaits....
Time goes by a hell of a lot faster than it used to...which leads to...
there is never enough time to do everything you need to do, spend time with everyone you care about.... today is Tuesday, blink and it will be Friday and you still will have a load of laundry to do, erronds to run and chores to do.... where is my allowance for cleaning the house? Oh wait that's right..... I AM A GROWN UP. Damnit.
it is really difficult to find the healthy balance between spending time with your significant other and your single friends....for which they mostly drift away. You can try to call or e-mail them but you are no longer considered "one of the girls"
Meeting someone you fall hopelessly in love with is the most amazing feeling in the world and scary as hell all at the same time.
The more money you make, the more bills you have.
Gas prices suck and are not getting any better and is offically dipping into what little funds were previously set aside for fun things....like new shoes.
Hangovers suck ass.... and seem to last for like 2 days....not just until noon. And are no longer cured by eating McDonalds which will only add to the growing size of your ass.
You find yourself tuning away from the pop radio stations because some of it...you just don't get.... and actaully enjoy the adult contemporary stations, 90's music or god help us.... talk radio...
When changing jobs the benefits package plays just as much of a role as the salary itself.

Getting older is not fun. I know now that I need 8 hours of sleep at night, coffee and a shower to function in the morning, a memory foam contour pillow for my neck, heels are not meant for standing in for hours on end, the best place in the world is in the arms of the man I adore and while sometimes they drive me completely insane my family are the people who will stand beside until the day I die.

Let me just end with this, in the cubicle of a 29 year old professional you will find a pink polka dot coozie with a lime green "C" monogrammed on it, paisley picture frames (all adding up to the notion that I am not ready to grow up) and a pink, fuzzy, bedazzled tiara on top of my computer that came with the best advice in the world...that of a 7 year old girl.....

She came into my office a couple of years ago when i was completely frustrated, working on a ridiculous project and said "Ms. Christine, you look like you are mad. When I have a bad day i like to play dress up and wear my tiara because I am a princess just like my Daddy says I am. You can have this tiara and wear it when you have a bad day."

Surprisingly enough, it works! I have been known to wear it from time to time and I highly recommend every girl get one. Who doesn't feel better when you have a tiara on your head? That is one part of my inner child that i refuse to let go and I am proud to say that yes, I am a 29 year old woman with a peanut buster fat ass, a radio stuck on Sirius 9 The Pulse, the sense of humor of a 13 year old, a pink fuzzy tiara and i am DAMN proud of who I am. Screw 30! Next year is my 2nd Annual 29th Birthday Celebration!

Cheers!